Living Together

There’d living with a roommate, then there’s how we in the Ampersand Household live together.

With just a roommate, you don’t necessarily know everything about the other person. You know enough to get by, but there’s a clear division.

That’s not how it works in our home. We have something like a covenantal friendship with Pam. We joke frequently that she and Nikki are more married than Nikki and I are. Nikki and I are ridiculously happy and in love and Pam officiated our wedding. Pam knows all my health things and frequently takes the role of caregiver more intimately than any of our friends and even some of my family would. We joke that Nikki and Pam are financially married while Nikki and I are romantically and legally married. 

We don’t envision a point in our lives where we will not have this kind of lifestyle together. We share meals, we share money, we share space. We share thoughts, feelings, hopes, and fears. When one of us has a hard day, the other two step up to support her. When one achieves a victory, we all feel her pride. 

It’s the kind of support that many are stunned by, but also covet. It isn’t easy and sometimes, the fights that occur are bitter and harsh. We feel the sting of angry words very deeply and we strive for honest, open, and forgiving connection. We confess and forgive easily. We work hard to deserve the respect and appreciation we give one another. 

There’s living together, then there’s living like we do. 

Nikki & Pam & Katie



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